Thursday, December 29, 2005

A full day

Last night I could not fall asleep. It was 2 a.m. and I was still wide awake thinking about how exhausted I would be today in my class. Probably the last class of computer training. I was awake and up by 7 a.m. Gone are the days where I can function on five measly hours of sleep. It was raining and I made the 45 minute drive North. The room we were in was freezing and I had to sit all day in a wet rain coat. The material was so intense and my concentration was lacking. I made it through the class and did manage to absorb some of the higher functions of the Word program. At lunch time I called my mother's to see if she had driven to Maryland to pick up my grandmother. She had but I also learned that her dog, Wendy was quite ill and my father was taking her to the vet.
I got home from school late, quickly ate some delicious Chinese food that Rob picked up and went to my parents. My mother and grandmother had just arrived. The dog seems to be struggling to breathe. The vet told my father that she has a lot of fluid around her heart and gave her an injection. He told him that in the next 24 hours she will start to improve or not. My father was in such poor condition that the vet carried the dog out to the car for him. This is a small dog, a Boston terrier. Tomorrow morning they will call the vet and see what else can be done.
Tomorrow is my parents 55th anniversary. Unusual these days. I know they really won't want to be celebrating but perhaps that's the very time something cheery is most needed or appreciated. My sister-in-law is making her baked ziti and I am buying fried chicken (a huge favorite), making a salad and picking up a cake for them. It will be a good distraction, at least briefly.
My son finally has a good job. I am almost afraid that if I say it, or write it, I will jinx it. It has taken him years to put his mind to something and get a job that has benefits, including a 401K. Please cross your fingers as you read this that he will stick with it. He seems to be in a better frame of mind and is going to join us for the small celebration tomorrow night. I am hoping that his spirits will improve when he has a nice paycheck each week. I know that my spirits would be lifted. I really need more income. I am hoping that I will be able to find something full time soon. Although I love the people and place where I work, I need a full time paycheck.
I am tired, as I write this. Most nights I fall into bed and am so tired that it's an effort to kiss my beloved good night. I hate that. On the other hand, I rejoice that with his support I have returned to living my life. Not just existing but living it. I have work friends and work clothes and am using the mind that had sat dormant for too long. Never a day goes by that I don't pause and feel grateful for where I am now and where I have come from. I hope by this time next year I am able to take my darling on a wonderful vacation.

1 comment:

Cynthia said...

Rest well my friend. I'll be wishing for your son to enjoy his job and for you to find the full time job you want. In the meantime, you've been tagged.