Yesterday was a rough one...........

I have to back about ten days to start this story...........
About ten days ago I commented to my husband that it seemed odd we had not heard from his Mom since July 8th. She called to wish me a happy birthday and I was in bed newly diagnosed with pneumonia. Didn't talk to her. I tried calling her back about a week ago and got no answer. Left a message saying it had been quite awhile since I had spoken with her. Mentioned this to Rob a few days later who said she had said something about taking a trip to Michigan around the end of July. Now I am thinking is it really possible she would go on this trip and not call and say goodbye or don't worry? Rob then tries to call her cell phone number to discover it has been changed and he doesn't have her number. He then calls his cousin in Michigan and low and behold she is there! She only talks to him a few minutes but mentions on her way home to Rhode Island she would like to swing by and take us out to dinner. I am so excited at the very chance that I am going to see Cassie, our ten year old niece. Because of several things (my job only giving me ten hours off a month for sickness, vacation etc and they are ALL used for illness), my Dad's health which has gone down the toilet in the past year and financial reasons (Rob just went back to work, and even at that, he took a pay cut). I love this little girl. I met her when she was about eight months old and barely walking. I watched her at her grandfather's wake so her Mom could greet visitors. I adore her. Her Mom was only thirty-three when she died of cancer and that night I laid in bed with her while her grandmother, aunts and girl cousins went for a final visit. I dressed her for her first holy communion as her mother requested and watched the pain on her Mom's face as she was unable to do it. Her Mom told her to always let me help her and that I would always be there for her. I have tried, with all of my being to live up to that request. Her first birthday without her Mommy she turned nine. We drove up to Rhode Island and I had an American Girl doll for her with the furniture and stuff. She was thrilled beyond words. There is something about this child that from the MOMENT I saw her melts my heart. Even to see her for a few hours would be a wonderful diversion from my grandmother's final days and my Dad's illness. The night before they were to come my husband got a phone call. She wanted us to meet them at four. While Rob could do that, I could not. I work until 5:30. She told him they could not wait for me. Rob at first said that he couldn't make it either then. When he hung up I told him that IF he could make it without me, he should go and see her. The next day his mother called him on his cell phone at work and told him that she wanted him to meet them at the mall at four o'clock and they would grab a quick bite and leave. He agreed to do that, texted me and I said sure, go ahead. As the afternoon wore on I got a literal pain in my stomach. It is one thing to know that this little girl is hundreds of miles north but she was literally in my back yard this ONE day. It was unbearable to think they would not wait. I texted him..no answer. I asked if I could leave work: NO. As I began to drive home I was overwhelmed with grief, then hurt and despair. WHY could they NOT wait? I just kept thinking of how this little girl had spent several days with her mother's cousin and in the Spring several days with another cousin. Why wasn't she spending time with us? I called home and Rob said they had left from the mall. I didn't have my mother-in-law's cell phone so I called her house and I left a message. I told her how very hurt I was. I might have cried, I know my voice was breaking as I told her how I felt that we deserved to spend time with our niece. Later I came home and I made a post on my Facebook page" I am very, very hurt that I did not get to see my mother-in-law and niece because they wouldn't wait two hours." Next thing I know one of my husband's cousins posts a post that I am attacking her mother (NEVER MENTIONED), her aunt and portraying them as heartless and cruel. Please reread my post. This could not be further from the truth. Several of my friends made posts saying I had not done this which seemed to incite her to make yet another post which was unkind. It went on and on and tonight I deleted the entire thread. What gets me is that she completely overlooks what was done to us. Rob spent ONE hour with his niece and I had no time. But she drove her across the country to see her mother's cousin. (Please don't misunderstand these cousins are wonderful people and we love them).
Rob made a post stating that his mother took two trips in the past few months and both were to see cousins. Today his aunt replied with a post to his post stating that his mother has asked to come and we always tell her it's not a good time. This, sadly, is not true. Last June, 2008 she wanted to come. We were committed to a wedding in Philadelphia of my childhood best friend. Had we not gone, friend would have been hurt and we would have lost the deposit on our room. She never called again. We had begged her for years, nearly once a month to come and each time we were told no, she couldn't get away. Right now my evenings and weekends are filled with trying to help my parents. My sister-in-law, Leslie who was also helping is in a rehab. Her leg bones are shattered. She has synthetic bone and cadaver bone implants. She is having it very rough right now.
Perhaps I am selfish but I think that my mother-in-law could have said "If we stay to see you, it will be late. Can you put us up for the night?" We have a guest room with a queen sized bed and we have a comfy sofa. It would not have been a problem. I wish I had been given some notice of the trip because I could have tried to get special approval for that afternoon. However, they seemed intent on only being in our area ONE hour. They live five hours away. I don't understand why we were not allotted more than ONE hour. I"m sorrry but I am still hurt.
Perhaps what is even more hurtful is that noone wants to admit that we were not given any real thought. Regardless, I missed an opportunity to see Cassandra. I have to honestly say that I think she is the one who lost the most yesterday but not having time with her uncle and aunt. How sad is that?