Tuesday, March 31, 2009

A Gorgeous Day

Today weather wise was gorgeous. I actually ventured out into my yard and cut some of my many dozen blooming daffodils for my daffodil vase. That heightened my spirits. I experienced several hours of frustrating phone calls today getting the place for my cat scan changed to where the x ray was taken, fighting with the company who still has not made ONE car payment for me, and fighting the medical group who billed ALL my visits incorrectly so that they were processed as out of network instead of in network. This would have left me owing thousands. I already owe plenty. So, I have my cat scan appointment for tomorrow afternoon. I am a bit nervous about it. When you have a history of cancer anything that suddenly appears is of concern. I am hoping I will hear quickly as I did when they read the x ray.
Today I had to go to the doctor's office and pick up my script for the scan. We actually went out and got a sandwich and walked around Target for half an hour. This is the first real exercise I have had in two weeks. I have been so weak that up until today I couldn't have done it. I am still coughing a lot, using inhalers (two different kinds) and wheezing but I do see some improvement.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel. I saw a word my doctor wrote on a form to the insurance company and my heart sank for a few minutes. My grandmother is becoming argumentative and difficult. My poor aunt deals with her daily while my mother is two hundred miles north. My mother says she has my father to care for and can't go. I think she can't deal with it. When I have been sick my mother has always distanced herself. I guess that's a protective mechanism she uses not to let things upset her. Wow if only I had that luxury!
She got mad at me when I pointed out that her mother had 96 years of excellent health. My mother has been very healthy too. I just want one day where I feel really good. I need to get back to work and back to getting my paychecks.
Hopefully I will have some good news in the next few days.

5 comments:

Susan C said...

Nelle, so glad you're making some progress.

So. . . what was the heart-sinking word that your doctor wrote in your chart?

IndigoSunMoon said...

Like Susan, I am wondering what that word was too.
Glad your slowly getting better honey. Springtime flowers always make things seem a little bit brighter.
Love you!
Connie

alphawoman said...

Nelle, you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Ronni Gordon said...

I sure know what you mean about every little thing making you nervous. Try to remember that most of the tests are routine "just to make sure" events and that they usually turn up nothing. Easier said than done, as you can see from my bog.

Glad the daffodils are coming up!

Missie said...

Keeping you in my prayers!

As everyone else has inquired....what word did you see that was heart sinking?