The case for half empty
I am so tired and not sleeping properly. From time to time this plagues me and when I do sleep I am having vivid nightmares about ghosts which don't really frighten me normally. These dreams are quite interesting once my heart stops pounding.
Our magnificent weather of several days has changed. We experienced rain last night, sleet and hail this morning and are now receiving several inches of snow. The roads are a sheet of ice. I went out for a prescription and slid all over the road before turning back. I will suffice with the lower dosages until road conditions improve.
My visit to my cardiologist was the same old/same old. I keep hoping one day he will have some really good news for me like I can go off of some of the costly prescriptions.
My grandmother told me again today that my siblings do not want to hear from me because all I do is complain. (How dare I complain about something as insignificant as heart surgery!) The hardest part of hearing that is that I only talk to them once or twice a year. By the way, siblings all deny saying this but Grandma tells me next time I should tell them they are lying, a word she rarely uses.
The case for half full
I have a wonderful friend, lover and companion in Rob....when all else walk away he will still be there doing whatever I need
This morning when I couldn't stop the skidding and thought I might actually end up dead
or seriously injured I quickly thought that if I remained calm (and didn't jerk the wheel) that I would be okay and I was.......
I also felt that a quickly mumbled prayer was answered so I guess God isn't sick of hearing me
I have wonderful caring neighbors
I have loved and been loved
I am still alive and ticking (literally)
I have courage to try to make things better
I know that tomorrow will be another chance to try again
I am struggling to focus on the good, the positive.
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