Thursday, January 12, 2012

Turning The Page

One of my New Years resolutions was to read more. There was a time when I read two books a week. I have had dry eyes and it makes it difficult to read. I have also switched to progressive lenses which I don't see as well with to read.
My reading glasses are an old prescription. I need to go to the eye doctor and get them checked again and maybe get another set of lenses for them. My DH had read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and the sequels and really liked them. I just finished the first one and have started on the second one (yes in ONE week. woohoo). They are so well written and I am a bit envious of my friend, Monica who read them in their original Swedish. I met her when I was 19 and she seemed so sophisticated, having left her Sweeden and lived as a governess in England before meeting a US soldier there and coming back with him. She took me under her wing in many ways while we worked at McGraw-Hill. After my son was born I quit. There was no child care back then and I lived in a rural area. Noone I knew was babysitting and for the next twelve years I was a stay at home Mom. After that I went to college part time until my son became ill at 16 and the next three years were spent taking him for medical treatments when he wasn't hospitalized. When he was, I slept in a recliner in his room. When he got better I went back to work and worked up until last year about this time when I left sick. Although I planned to return about this time, the company let me go and I discovered that I am no longer able to work. It's such a huge adjustment. I miss my coworkers. I miss the socializing. I miss my paychecks. I even miss my cafeteria with our own little Starbucks in it. It's like my entire life has changed so much. There was a time when I had so many friends. It seems over the years they have moved away or their lives went in a different direction. I feel alone much of the time. One of my friends was going to come visit today but ended up in an emergency room with her elderly aunt. If only there really were a time machine and we could go back. If only I could feel what it was like to be 19 again, healthy and strong. I don't remember what it was like not to be short of breath. I've been this way for years now. My neighbor came over yesterday to check on me and we went for a walk. She couldn't believe how much trouble I had going up a small incline. I have oxygen but it's so heavy to carry. We had thought we would go a mile. I had to stop after half a mile. At least I made it that far. It was good to spend time with a friend.

2 comments:

TARYTERRE said...

I am so glad you are getting to read and have found a series of books you like. Never read them because of the violence within. I can't stomach it. My mom has dry eyes so i know how they can interfere. How interesting about your friend from Sweden. And your young life. Such a shame they made the decision to let you go. You were a valuable employee, a part of the team. It's nice you have someone nearby you can go for a walk with. All my friends around here have passed on. I just saw your email the other day. I am sorry I haven't had a chance to answer. I have been driving a porcelain bus, battling the flu, fever, etc and losing this week. So-oo sick. Feel horrible. I'll be back again to comment, when i'm feeling better. take care.

alphawoman said...

I think I read the first, the girl with the golden dragon tattoo... was that the name? I was half way through the second one and had to return it to the library! I should go find a paperback or check it out again. I did enjoy the intricate complicated story line. The violence was scary bad, but I just skim over that. Glad you are able to a friend over. I would have to clean for a day before letting anyone in my house! But I know what you mean about friends.