Hopefully the BIG Day

Today I am armed with printed out reports that I have found about the effects of radiation on the lungs. I meet my doctor at 2 and we will be discussing lots of information, including the chemical makeup of the fluid that was removed. Depending on the proteins in it, we should know where the fluid came from and that will give a lot of information. There is either a problem with the heart or lungs and that should point us in the right direction. I am nervous but anxious to know. I can deal with anything as long as I know WHAT it is I am dealing with. I saw my cardiologist Monday and he spent 45 minutes discussing things. He feels that the problem is with the lungs (as my heart is pumping like a champ.) Both my heart and lungs are small and I carry around extra weight. It would be easier on them if I didn't but I am told that it is not the cause of the problem and while it might help to lose more weight, it might not. Right now my help is coming from liquid oxygen. It is a major inconvenience, especially when I go out and have to carry a seven pound tank everywhere. It is helping me though. I use it connected to my CPAP machine which I sleep with also. So right now I am on oxygen 24/7. I use less when resting than when excerting and adjust the flow accordingly. It's another world with always being concerned about the plastic tubing, it slows me down. Last night I wanted some grilled asparagas and took it off while putting the veggies on the heat and later removing them. I am adjusting but hoping that I won't need this forever.
I want to feel that I am moving forward and slowly making progress to being more independent again. I am very independent and do not enjoy relying on others to help me grocery shop or do other things that I can't do on my own.
I will never again take something like breathing for granted.