Wednesday, August 24, 2011

And the beats go on.............

The past few days have been really tough for me. The more I do, the more pain I experience. I am not really supposed to be doing anything but when I am home alone I make myself toast or tea and even that hurts. Moving hurts.

I have so many things that I simply must take care of. My employer fired me and my health insurance ends August 31. I had to get onto my husband's at that time. That meant checking to see that all my doctors accept his insurance. Good news on that front: two that were out of network on my insurance will be IN network on his. Problem is I had met ALL my deductibles under my insurance and will now have to meet them on his. My income has ended and I am not eligible for unemployment. My short term disability is exhausted. Thankfully, I had inherited a few thousand dollars about a year ago and held onto it and am using that now to subsidize our bills. Thank God I didn't run out and do something extravagant with it.

My days are rather quiet here. I take a few cat naps throughout the day. During the day I try to take Tylenol only then the stronger pain med to sleep. Some nights I cannot get comfortable and just can't sleep. Yesterday I was laying in my recliner when it began to vibrate. My windows shook like a huge wind was coming. The cat stood up on the sofa like what is going on? I then felt the sofa which was also vibrating and I thought perhaps a jet had crashed. Put on the tv and quickly learned it had been an earthquake. Interesting. Things just get stranger and stranger.
I am supposed to get my staples out tomorrow. There are 31 and very irritating and have been in almost a month. I want them out but it will be painful because of the sensitive area they are in. I don't look forward to that part. On Friday a man is coming to put pull down stairs on my attic door. That way Rob can access the attic without all the ordeal of carrying a ladder upstairs etc. which is not safe anyway. This Christmas will be so much easier as we keep our prelit tree and all up there. I sense Fall in the area. It's always been my favorite season. So glad I will be here to enjoy it. The doctor said I am "resilient". Two time cancer survivor, two time open heart surgery survivor with two mechanical heart valves. Yes, I think that is the word for me. It will only get better from here. The future's so bright I gotta wear shades. :) My only goal for the future is to get my health back and I feel it coming.


Jud said...

You are much stronger than I am - or would be - in your situation, Mags! I have a lot of respect for you and your husband.

What can Little One and I do for you? Can we send you a book or somehing to help occupy some of your time during the day?

You can always shoot me an email to chat if you get bored!!


I don't know how you do the things you do. You must be "resilient" and then some. I am glad you will have some medical insurance. That is a blessing. And the fact you have a little extra money socked away, to see you through, is another. I am sorry for your pain, though, but am touched to my core by your positive attitude. You hang in there. Nothing but blue skies from now on.

Ronni Gordon said...

So sorry to hear about all of this. Can't you get Social Security Disability?

Nelle said...

Thank you for your comment. I have a stack of books to read but it hurts my arms to hold them so I watch a lot of tv and cat nap. Right now they don't want me doing much other than that and taking a ten minute walk each day.

Thank you for all your kind and encouraging words. I am enjoying your quotes on twitter.

I have applied (which is a time consuming task) FOR SSDI....they requested more information which I have sent but they tell me it takes months to hear. Since I worked part time for many years and spent about a year in total out on disability in the past few days, the payments would be under $600 a month. I am not going to hire a lawyer as they take up to 30% of your first check (which is retroed).

Cynthia said...

Resilient is an understatement. You're an incredibly strong woman.