Frazzled

Today is a Thursday. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I am here trying to study. Notice I said trying. Even though I have asked family and friends not to phone me or drop by, they still seem compelled to do so. I have the attention span of a gnat these days. I don't know if it's age, physical conditions, or mental problems. Perhaps C: all of the above. I only know that the slightest thing is a major distraction for me, breaking my flow of thoughts. At times I feel that I have bitten off more than I can chew. For the first time in my life I have missed scheduled dental and doctor appointments. Some days I am in such a hurry, I don't even check my calendar, which has always been a morning ritual. I just can't seem to get it together with this course. I was an A student.

Is this what happens when estrogen flees from your body? I don't think the fact that I am menopausal is insignificant.

Today I have a full plate, as usual. I have been up since 6:45. I have fed the pets, cleaned the kitchen after breakfast, made the bed and studied ONE of two chapters. Retained perhaps 50% of the facts, and calculated my math problems incorrectly. I who tutored others in algebra. I am now taking a break before showering. After that I have to drive to Rob's work, pick up his check and drive to the bank where we have an emergency savings account. I will cash both our checks there and then drive to the bank where we have our (free) checking account to deposit the cash. That covers the mortgage check I had to mail yesterday. After that I will return home attempting to absorb the next chapter and finish the review for 15 chapters (Lord help me!)

About 3, I have to leave for the cardiologist. I will then have to face the music for totally missing my last appointment, for the little change in my cholesterol and weight......and he wonders why there are times I need tranquilizers. I really like this doctor. I have a lot of faith in him and truly believe had I not found him when I did I would most likely not be here now. He is very serious and when he gives orders he expects them to be followed........to the letter. I get that. Part of me appreciates that. Another part thinks that he doesn't understand how hard it is to incorporate all of this into a stressed out, little time for relaxation life.

When I leave the cardiologist I will go to school where I will be quizzed. Not sure if my carpooling buddy will be going tonight. She went on Tuesday but was sick and has been out of work all week until today. The Woody Allen aspect of my personality is wondering if she is showering me with germs in the shared vehicle.

I cannot create paragraphs today. I could barely get onto Blog Spot. Sorry for my continuous flow of words here. It's not that I didn't want paragraphs.....it's just that I couldn't. (Inability to create paragraphs is just another one of those menopausal symptoms. Love ~ jennifer.)

Okay time to kick it up a notch and take my shower. Those ten or fifteen minutes are often the most relaxing part of my day. Although to be honest, there are days I can't fit that in either!

Did I mention that my final exam will be the Tuesday after Thanksgiving? God give me strength. Seriously.