Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Wanting to make it easier

I have a coworker who has only been with us about a month. He is originally from Atlanta. When he came to New Jersey it was with the hope that he could find some medical treatment for his father who had the worst form of leukemia. In New Jersey there is a Cancer Institute and it is wonderful. For reasons I do not understand this young man's Dad ended up in a place I have never heard of. I guess it is possible they were doing some kind of experimental drug trial. He was urged by many people to move his father but that did not happen. Three months ago his brother went into New York and was killed in a motor vehicle accident. Two weeks ago he lost his father and the last person left in his nuclear family.

This is a nice young man. There is discussion and the men in our group feel it is best left alone. The women feel a card needs to be passed and a collection taken. The young man who knows him best says that he would be embarassed by the attention. Last week we had our meeting and my heart ached as he broke down and had to leave when he began to talk about what he had gone through. He is in pain. I want to help him but it's a fine line. He told me they did some genetic testing as his grandmother died from the same disease his father had. His tests came back that he doesn't carry this gene. I was relieved for him. I try to say hello, offer him friendship in a way that will be acceptable to him but I hope he knows that others do care.

1 comment:

Ronni Gordon said...

How about just a simple card with all of your names on it? Maybe a collection would embarrass him, but I bet a card would just show him that you all care. (Sounds like I'm writing a Hallmark ad!)